Tattoo Disappointment July 30, 2005

I think my mother cursed us.

In our apprehension and excitement we got to the tatoo parlor 30 minutes early.

Joanna and I are both tattoo virgins. We have never set foot in a tattoo parlor before. We had no idea what to expect.

When we entered no one greeted us. So I volunteered that we were early for our 7 p.m. appointment. We were told our artist would be out in a minute.

No one asked us anything else. Are they supposed to? I have no idea. Is a tattoo parlor like a beauty salon? Should they be showing me books, asking me what I want or if I’d like some water? We were armed with a rough download of a celtic knot that we wanted. So we started looking at the art on the walls, trying to see if there was another celtic knot that we liked.

Finally, the receptionist asked us if we had any questions. I had no idea what to ask so I asked him if there was anything we should know. He said no, but that we were in the right place.

Alrighty then, so we kept standing there like dorks talking amongst ourselves and trying to figure out what to do. I don’ t know if they knew what to do with us either, they just looked at us and kept on talking to each other.

After another 10 excruciatingly long minutes the receptionist asked us if we knew what we wanted and if we wanted to see some designs. FINALLY some help. So I told him we wanted a celtic knot and he went to the back to grab the file.

We didn’t see anything we liked in the celtic file, so our last hope was that our tattoo artist would actually be able to draw. Since we were so friendly with the receptionist I thought we’d ask him if our artist should be able to draw from the sample we brought in. He was confident that it could be done.

Finally the mysterious artist appeared. He is a large Latin boy covered in tattoos. Ok, so at least he partakes in the speciality. He was shocked there were two of us, even though I clearly stipulated that when I made the appointment. It all went down hill after that. I think he made up his mind right then it wasn’t happening and put up every wall after that.

We showed him what we wanted and the first words out of his mouth were - I can’t work with that and he actually threw the paper on the floor. So boom shot down. No one stepped in and offered to draw. They just all stood around.

There were double the number of workers to customers and yet we continued to wait. I was quite flabbergasted that he just so cavalierly dismissed us. He apparently wasn’t in the mood to work. He told us that he was not an artist but that he was a tracer and copier. Good to know.

We just took it as a sign from God and my mother that this was not the place for us. And when you make your appointment realize that your tattoo applicator might not be an artist, but I’m glad that he revealed that before he picked up the needle to draw on me.

So we walked away sans tattoo quite frustrated. I am determined to get our tattoo but I will not be going back there.