Tattoo - a sign of friendship July 29, 2005

I’m getting a divorce.

You might not know that I was married. But in a round about way I was, it wasn’t a traditional marriage but it definitely made me more whole. Joanna and I joke that we were non-sexual lesbian life partners. We were inseparable for five years and have been friends for 12.

We moved in together on June 1, 2000. No ceremony. No ring exchange and no formal vows. Instead she reached in to save me at my lowest point. I had hit my rock bottom emotionally, physically and spiritually. Outwardly I looked fine. I still went to work. I still laughed. No one but her saw that anything was wrong. She saw behind my mask and realized I was empty, fragile, lonely and depressed.

She is more than my best friend, she’s my sister. God brought us together as friends when we were both lost as freshman in college and solidified our relationship when he made us roommates. He knew what we would need from each other and how we could help each other grow. From her I learned how to trust. I learned that people do keep their word. In many ways she taught me about unconditional love. More often than I can count she was the only Jesus I could see. We travelled, cried, argued, decorated, and laughed. We got silly, emotional, philosophical, spiritual and delirious. We’ve seen each other at our best and worst. She’s made me a better person.

Now the time has come for us to separate and grow in different areas. I’m moving to Rancho Santa Margarita to be closer to work and Brian. She’s going to stay in the Brea area. We’re down to the difficult task of packing and making the separation feel more real.

In honor of our friendship we’re going to get matching tatoos. In my ways she’s already made a permanent mark on me, this is just an outward symbol of that. We think we’re going to get a celtic friendship knot. People at work have recommended a place.

I just called and we’re set for tomorrow at 7 p.m.